What is the first thing you notice about someone from the opposite gender? Is it their beautiful face, their great body, their gorgeous smile, their wonderfully flawless skin or their deep sapphire eyes? Those are just examples; it could really be any physical features, which are honestly the first things we notice about someone. I often hear people say that the first thing they noticed about their partner was their sense of humor or the way they seemed to care about everyone. This may be the first thing that attracted them to their partner, but it’s not the first thing they noticed. The way you look is going to be one of the biggest factors in any first impression. That’s why we clean ourselves up when we go to a job interview or a blind date; we want people to see how nice we look so that they will think highly of us. I also hear a lot of people say that physical attractiveness isn’t important to them in the people they date, which is almost always a lie. What they’re really saying is that they have a broader idea of what they find attractive in a partner.I’m going to be the first to admit that physical attraction (looks) are important to me in the people I date. Yes, I know I’m a jerk for saying this, but it’s true, as it should be in any relationship between two people. Because, and let’s be honest with ourselves, an attractive person is going to be more pleasing to look at, and if you’re going to spend the rest of your life with a person, it’s important that you like looking at them. I’m not trying to say that all girls have to look like supermodels, because not everybody looks for that, but I am saying that, no matter what attracts you, you should be with someone who you are physically attracted to.
I’m going to go off on a bit of a personal tangent here, so bear with me and try to not judge me as a jerk right off the bat. There are plenty of reasons why I like to be attracted to a girl I’m with which I personally don’t think are shallow. If I’m going to be with someone for time and all eternity, someone who I am going to be waking up next to every morning, I’d like that person to be pleasant to look at. Also, when a girl takes the time to make herself look nice (makeup, showering, etc.), it’s usually a good indicator that she things highly of herself and wants others to as well, which I like in a girl. I also like a girl who has a slim, fit figure. I’m not the most active person in the world, but I love to hike and play Ultimate Frisbee, and I’d like for the girls I’m with to be able to join me in those activities, and an overweight girl is not going to be able to do that. If a girl doesn’t care about the shape she’s in, it’s usually a good indicator to me that she doesn’t care about herself in general, which is a turn off to me.
So, does it make me a shallow jerk simply because I want a girl to like herself enough to care about what she looks like? If the answer is yes, then I guess I am a jerk. But, and I’ve probably said this before, I’d rather marry someone who is going to make me happy than not. And physical beauty is a key factor in making me happy.
What about everybody else? What physical traits to you find most attractive in the opposite gender? How important are those traits to you? Let’s have a discussion about it.
(Just so people don’t think I only focus on how a person looks, the next post is going to be about the other, deeper things that attract me to someone.)
Beauty Part 1: Body
Beauty Part 2:Mind
Beauty Part 3: Soul
The only point I disagree with you on is makeup. I personally feel too many girls wear too much makeup, thereby using makeup to sculpt a new face, implying they're not comfortable with the one they have. That's one of the main reasons I almost never wear makeup: I'm perfectly comfortable with the face I have and don't feel the need to bury it under ten layers of primer and foundation and such nonsense.
ReplyDeleteI think when talking about this particular aspect of beauty, one thing to keep in mind is that even if it does play an important part in your capability to fall for someone, it's not essential to it. I think there's a clear difference between the two. Basically all I really think is important is to just acknowlege that someone is physically atractive in the first place.
ReplyDeleteYou know, it's kind of like one of those moments where you tell your significant other that they're far more beautiful to you than someone who is clearly more physically atractive than they are, by the basic logical definition of physical beauty that is. But when you say that it's not just you trying to make them feel better by saying something they want to hear rather than the truth. Fact of the matter is it really is the truth, sthey really are more beautiful to you than anyone else in the whole world, just simply because they're physically atractive in the first place. And whatever ways in which the other person is more so just doesn't matter to you, even if it is the truth. Throw in all those other ways in which someone can be beautiful that you talk about with your other posts and that makes it true all the more so.
Basically I just think that when it comes to physical atraction, there are indeed different levels on which someone can be physically atractive. But putting too much emphasis on that aspect really is doing nothing more than being way more picky than you really should be.