House Cleaning

Have you ever seen the movie “Hitch”? If you haven’t, I highly recommend going out and renting it. It’s one of my favorite romantic comedies, and also the source of the subject I’d like to talk about today. In the movie the main character (played by Will Smith) is a dating consultant. He helps guys win over the hearts of the girls they are in love with. There is one line that Will says that really stands out to me. When he introduces himself to his clients he always starts by saying: “Basic principles – No matter what, no matter when, no matter who… any man has a chance to sweep any woman off her feet; he just needs the right broom.” This is the line I’d like to talk about today.

Is it true? Does any guy in the world have a chance to be with any girl in the world? I’m sure that if the guy really, really tries to get the girl, he could be with any girl he chooses. But, can he do it without lying? Despite how much I like the movie, it seems that Will’s character helps his clients win over women by coaching them on how to lie properly. I’m not talking about big lies, but rather the little things. He has them dress and act differently than is normal for them, he teaches them to say things they would never normally say, and has them do things that are not normal. Basically, he teaches them to be someone that they are not, which is where I begin to have a problem with the concept. When a girl falls for you because you are acting like something that you’re not, there’s going to be problems with the relationship later on. She’s eventually going to find out what you’re really like and then one of two things will happen. Either she will still love you and will continue to love you for whom you really are, or she will be infuriated that you lied to her and will leave you. It’s my opinion that the latter will happen more often than not. Nobody likes to be lied to, especially girls. It makes them feel betrayed.

So, how can any guy win over any girl without lying? Is it even possible? I know that there are lots of us in the world that would like to believe that it is, but there must be certain points where it’s just not. How do we know when we’ve reached that point, though? Is there going to be something that the girl says or does that will clue us in to whether we’ve missed the chance to sweep them off their feet? What if, when we attempt to sweep, it turns out that we’ve used the wrong broom? Do we then need to break out a vacuum instead? When I really look at the quote in question, I notice that there are certain… restrictions implicit in it. Notice that it says “…has a chance” not “…has several chances”. That implies that we have one, and only one, chance to sweep the girl up. So, what do we do if we blow that chance? Would you even know if you already have? You may think that you’re just barely attempting to sweep up a certain girl, but she may have already decided that you’ve failed because of something that you did (or didn’t do) in the past. Time travel hasn’t been invented yet, so there’s no real way to go back and change whatever it is that has colored her opinion of you. But, are there ways to change the color of that opinion to a more pleasing hue? If there is, it’s probably an uphill battle and will take some time and patience, but if you really like the girl, it’ll probably be worth it.

This, I guess, is what it all really boils down to. If you really like a girl, you should be willing to do whatever it takes to win her heart, as long as you remain truthful with her. And girls, you should be willing to like a guy for who he is. Don’t force us to pretend to be something we’re not just to get your attention. That’s not fair to us. What does everyone else think about this? Comments, please.